Who is Influencing you About Modesty?

Let me paint a scary picture for you: 

The woman with high influence as a Christ follower is someone who has slept and dated multiple men at once and has posted pictures that looks like it would have been in a Playboy magazine. Her response when confronted about her sinful actions? “Jesus still loves me.” 

Now, this isn’t going to be the topic of this post because she is a child of God just like me and just like you. This post is not to shame or condemn her because if you were to open up the phone of most American girls, you will find material very similar to this, just privately and hidden. I am not here to shame anyone because Christ isn’t even shaming us. Christ has forgiven us. Christ loves us. Therefore, I love her and am praying for her heart. I love my sister who has done these things. But just like Christ loves us, Christ calls us higher. 

Romans 2:4 says, “Or do you presume on the riches of his kindness and forbearance and patience, not knowing that God's kindness is meant to lead you to repentance?” 

God’s goodness and grace is so sweet, but He didn’t save you so you could continue in the lust and flesh filled life you desire. His grace leads you into sweet repentance. This repentance is not shameful, it is freedom filled and joy filled. (For more, read Romans 6:15-23.)

What’s the problem with the gal I previously brought up? The problem is not her sin. I don’t want to focus on her or the sin. The problem is that because she has proclaimed she loves Jesus and she has a lot of followers, she has somehow earned the title of influence within Christian women. Her and her actions are now going to be followed by all the young, impressionable girls watching her and looking to her for guidance. They look up to her and see a girl who “loves Jesus” and will follow in her footsteps. Matthew 18:6, “But whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a great millstone fastened around his neck and to be drowned in the depth of the sea.”

What happens when that 14 year old girl who sees that it’s okay to sleep with a guy you aren’t married to because Jesus will still love you? What happens when we start replacing our conviction with apathy? What happens when we aren’t aware that our sin and lack of self control have consequences and repercussions? 

As a generation, we have entered into this sexual era. Where we try to use our sexuality as our identity and our body as a scale for how worthy we are. We have become so dependent on others to validate us in every way that when someone compliments us, it’s not enough. So we go to social media and desire more and more likes because in our head, the more people that worship how we look means we are somehow more valuable because of it. The more we show from our body, the more we have to compromise to keep the validation fresh. 

Our lives are on our phones and social media, there is no getting around it. So we need to fill our phone and social media with things that keep our eyes and hearts guarded from this worldly perversity. As women, modesty is the standard from God. I am not going to put all the overused verses that talks about how our body is a temple, we are beautifully and wonderfully made, or the one about not having our adorning being exteneral because those verses have been watered down without context. But what I will use is this, 1 Thessalonians 4:3-4, “For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you abstain from sexual immorality; that each one of you know how to control his own body in holiness and honor.” Ask yourself these questions:

  1. Is this outfit honoring the Lord? 

  2. Is this picture I just posted honoring the Lord?

  3. Is this outfit/picture I posted honoring my brothers in Christ? 

  4. Will these photos make my brother stumble?

See, society wants to push, “it’s not my job to worry about what I wear and how it effects that guy. He should be able to control himself.” Well, to a certain degree yes, but you know your heart’s intentions. There is more behind why you are wearing that outfit in the first place and actually, yes you do need to worry about your brother. Romans 12:10, “Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor.”

What needs to happen is we need to stop glorifying sin and stop looking up to people who aren’t even looking to God and walking by the spirit. Galations 5:19-21 says, “Now the deeds of the flesh are evident, which are: immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmities, strife, jealousy, outbursts of anger, disputes, dissensions, factions, envying, drunkenness, carousing, and things like these, of which I forewarn you, just as I have forewarned you, that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God.” 

When people are walking by the flesh the rotten fruit will come from it. You will be able to see it manifest through their actions. It’s ugly and usually very worldly. On the other hand, Galatians 5:22 talks about the fruit of the spirit, “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.” People who walk throughout their day with these characteristics are the type of people to be inspired by and to follow. Use discernment when following people in person or on Instagram, friends. 

So what does this mean for me?

Stop accepting these social norms because everyone is doing it. Stop celebrating girls being half naked on Instagram. Stop commenting “YAS QUEEEEN” when all you are doing is enabling them and affirming their dishonorable behavior. Stop making appearances the main focus of who they are. 

Start calling one another higher (IN LOVE) when you see your sister act out of insecurity. Start sharing how you see Jesus in her. Start sending identity affirming bible verses to one another. Remind your sister how absolutely loved she is despite who is texting her, giving her attention, or how good she can act. 

We always want to share the “We are set apart daughters of Jesus” pinterest quotes on our stories, but we need to start acting like it. Let’s stop being half way in the world’s way of dressing, talking, posting, and acting and half way believing that we are God’s daughters. Let us walk in the fullness of who God wants us to be by following Him and only Him. Let us honor what Jesus has spoken and stop flirting with the world.