Fighting through the Shame

Feeling shameful.

Feeling guilty.

Feeling embarrassment.

Why did I do that? Why do I keep doing that? Why do I keep going back to him? I know that he literally only likes me for my body. He literally said those exact words. Why?


The bottom line is comfort. I want comfort. God has created me and all humans to need some source of comfort. He calls us to receive comfort from Him and Him alone. Psalm 23:4 says, "Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me."

To the girl who is reading this right now and has made physical mistakes with guys: This post was written with a lot of prayers to touch yourheart. To give youthe revelation of Jesus' forgiveness and grace that never fails. His love doesn't make sense to us so choose to believe the truth that you do not need to feel shameful of what you've done. Read this with an open heart and ask the Lord to speak through this. You deserve freedom. You no longer have to be held in handcuffs by the enemy. Jesus is freedom.

We are walking through this short life on earth constantly having a target right above our head. The enemy is going to try his hardest to get us off track. He does it in subtle ways that will convince you that the bad things you are doing aren't self-destructive. He loves to tell us the things of this world will be more satisfying than what God has for us. This isn't new- look at how he convinced Adam and Eve. Satan loves to trick us so we will fix our eyes on him and not God. He tells us to do things that cause us to shift our comfort from God to the things of this world.

So much of the time we look at comfort as not a big deal but really it's everything. I have realized that most all of my sin is rooted in me trying to find comfort in things other than God. I am trying to find momentary quick fixes to comfort me so I end up doing what my flesh and emotions want. Just because my heart tells me what it wants doesn't mean I should do it. Emotions do not equal truth. It is actually quite dangerous to listen to your heart. In Jeremiah 17:9 it says, "The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?" You guys, if we follow our heart our whole life it might lead to some really bad things. Don't get me wrong, our hearts aren't evil but if it isn't synced and aligned with the Lord's then it can be dangerous.

When we are feeling sad, stressed, anxious, or worried we need to run to God for comfort. Run to His word that will not only comfort you but give you confidence and peace in times that are hard. It doesn't make sense, but the Lord honors the righteous and the ones who seek after Him. I believe that if we put the Lord as our main comforter, then it will "fix" a lot of our problems.

We feel shame and some type of embarrassment when we do something we know we shouldn't have done. We feel guilty. We allow that shame to follow us in our relationship with Christ because that's what the enemy wants us to believe. He wants us to believe because of that mistake, we aren't good enough to be close with God anymore. How silly is that?

Romans 8:1 promises "therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus," Why?

"Because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set you free from the law of sin and death." (8:2)

Let me emphasize-THERE IS NO CONDEMNATION IN CHRIST JESUS. Jesus came here and died on the cross for all sins and all people who choose to believe in Him. So that means once you believe in Him, repent of our sins, and start following him, you have a new spirit in you. The Spirit of Jesus that calls you redeemed because of the sacrifice given to you. Think about it, why would Jesus condemn you for sinning when He loves you enough to die for those sins?  When you feel shame or guilt, know that it's not from God it's from the enemy or even yourself. Because we are made of flesh, we cannot fathom God's love and sacrifice for us. We have such a hard time understanding it but that's ok.

Also, I want to say something...

It doesn't matter what you have done in your past.

It doesn't matter what you will do in your future.

Jesus has died for your sin so you don't have to carry that weight.

Do not let the enemy's lies get in the way of knowing God's truth for you.

So how do we fight the shame in the moment?

  1. Go against what flesh/the enemy is saying andrepent. Tell the Lord that you are sorry and move on. Repentance should be joyful. What a Father we have that is so quick to forgive!! Cover yourself with Scripture. Scripture that affirms you of how loved you are by the Lord and nothing you do can change that! When you have truth to rebuke the lie with- you are unstoppable.

  2. Tell a friend what happened. The sooner you bring it to light, the less darkness can come of it. When you confess it out loud with someone, chains are broken.

  3. Don't dwell on it, because God sure isn't. Acts 3:19, "Repent, then, and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped out, that times of refreshing may come from the Lord." When you repent, your sin is wiped clean. No grudges. No shame. There is no place in the bible that will say feeling guilt is a feeling you have to feel. Jesus didn't die on the cross for you to carry it. He has overcome.