It's Ok to Not Be Ok...But Be With Jesus.
It’s ok to not be ok.
This is a popular statement that people in our society likes to say to one another. It’s a beautiful and liberating statement considering everyone feels the pressure to look like they have everything together and that they aren’t struggling.
It IS ok to not be ok. It is NORMAL to not be ok. Heck, I would even go so far to say that if you’re always doing ok, something is wrong. Because as followers of Christ, we shouldn’t be ok all the time. We shouldn’t have everything under control. If we were able to have everything together, we wouldn’t need Jesus (Isaiah 41:13). That is where this post is headed…..
It’s ok to not be ok ...but don’t be alone while you’re not ok. Be with Jesus. Go in the presence of the Lord when you’re not ok.
When I was in Nepal over the summer, I was NOT OK. I was in bed for over a week, couldn’t move, would get out of bed to go to the bathroom and I would be out of breath. Emotionally, I was not ok. I felt alone. More alone than ever before.
See, over the years, I have developed lies that told me if I felt sad, angry, confused, anxious, or any other emotions, then I wasn’t having enough faith in the Lord. I wasn’t trusting the Lord enough. So I didn’t feel things. I had to be strong. I looked past whatever emotion I was feeling because I needed to have faith that God worked all things out for His and our good.
I remember being at the end of myself and laying in bed. My friend and I were texting and I said with no hope, “Oh well. It’ll be alright.” She replies, “Yeah it will be. But you don’t have to say that right now.”
See, I didn’t understand that. Here I thought, “I have to be strong. I have to have faith. I have to be strong or else who knows where my mind will go. I have to put aside my feelings and emotions because that means weakness.”
I felt this invitation from the Lord to be vulnerable with Him. So I sat up, put on some worship music, got some tissues, and cried. For the first time EVER, I was sitting and feeling all the emotions. Anger, major confusion, sadness, loneliness, and anxiousness. All at once. Yet, above all of those feelings, I felt joy. I felt seen and known by the Father.
It was ok that I wasn’t ok.
Because I went to the Father when I wasn’t ok.
See, in that moment I was acknowledging my pain. Acknowledging my needs that needed to be met & fulfilled. Acknowledging the holes that needed to be filled. Acknowledging that I needed to be held, comforted, and reminded that I was seen.
This is the Father’s role.
2 Corinthians 1:3-4, “Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.”
See, the beautiful part about God is that He DESIRES to comfort us. We aren’t annoying or too much for Him. We are His children who He desires to hold. He is jealous for us and wants us to run to Him! We can’t do that if we are just sitting and sulking like a victim in a hard situation or if we don’t address how we’re feeling. We need to go to Him.
It is CRUCIAL to go to God when you’re not ok. You know why?
The enemy POUNCES when we don’t act fast. The enemy JUMPS when we think we can handle it on our own, because he knows that we’re just human and that we are powerless without Jesus. The enemy wants to get you when you are down and when you THINK you are ok. So acknowledge that you aren’t ok. Your problem doesn’t stem from your weakness, your problem comes if you aren’t pursuing the Lord through your weakness.
Revelation 12:11: "And they overcame him by the blood of the Lamb, and by the word of their testimony; and they loved not their lives unto the death." You overcome your battles through the blood of the slain and perfect lamb. Not self love. Not self care. The perfect lamb.
Your sadness will fester in your heart the more you harbor it. See, like the first point says, the enemy will pounce. The result of the enemy pouncing and attacking will create unhealthy seeds that naturally grow in your heart. Such as bitterness, anger, jealousy, anxiety, depression, lies. Anxiety doesn’t just happen. It’s formed overtime if it’s not dealt with properly. Same thing with all these things. Cain and Abel didn’t just hate each other, Cain continuously got jealous, which turned into comparison, which turned into anger, which turned into him killing Abel.
Tangible tips to embrace not being ok, but with Jesus:
When you are not ok, stop what you are doing and close your eyes. Be quiet and breathe. Take a few deep breaths and allow yourself to get into a place of calmness with the Lord.
Once you’ve calmed down, either say out loud, in your head, or on paper exactly how you feel. What I do is I write Jesus a letter. I start it out with, “Dear Jesus, ….” And I explain EXACTLY how I am feeling. I don’t leave anything out, even if it’s ugly. He wants it. He won't get offended. Don’t try and hide anything.
Take a moment and just listen. Train yourself to BE STILL and just listen. Silence ALL of your thoughts and listen. Journal out any other thoughts.
(Most important step!) Open up your bible and write down a few bible verses or passages that describe God’s character. Write these out and declare them over yourself. You are God’s child, you have AUTHORITY. Speak it out against your situation. Speak it out against your enemies. Speak it out against THE enemy. Speak it out against the anxiety that is trying to deceive you.
When you have the characteristics of God written out, also write out when you have seen that characteristic of God play out in your own life. When you are able to connect truth with how it is your truth in real life, it increases your faith. It increases your faith for what God is going to do in your life, since He’s already shown up before.
Friend, I get it. There is so much pressure to look the part. There is so much stress on who to be. But honestly, I think most of the stress, anxiousness, and pressure we feel is brought on by ourselves. LEt’s be so wrapped up in who God is that we won’t even be worried when trials come because we know our place. We know our authority. <3